Saucy Faucet

Got back from nashville--and signed up with the Red Cross to help assist with the Katrina relief. No clue what I will be doing but I have to find some way to help.

Please keep in your prayers my loved ones in New Orleans especially the Bagleys.

One of my co-workers was lucky enough to not lose family, but has lost everything she owned-except the clothes they evacuated with... No car, no home.. nothing. It's hard to fathom the destruction on the news. I have already caught up with a bunch of stories and people here are hoarding gas the prices of which are SOARING.

I did meet up with some Buzznet folks in nashville--they were awesome.

I feel a bit better, though my color is off... I am usually a very rosey-cheeked girl, and I am a bit yellow. (at least in Mom's estimation.)

I am starting a work blog. I just can't help it. There are too many stories to tell. If you want the url, just message me... and I'll give it to you. Of course, it's an anonymous blog so no shoutin' my name in the comments. (y'hear?) Since I spend my life at work these days, I figure that sort of a blog would be more interesting anyway.

I wanted to share my Wal-Mart woes, but the fire is sort of out by now. Basically I needed to fill a script from the doctor, but my insurance, though Blue Crap/Blue Shit, is based out of state. Time for a game of "Stump the Pharmacy!"

Since Wally World is the huge store in town, I decide to go to the Mom and Pop Pharmacy downtown. Wetumpka has a cute town square and Adams Drug was the place that used to keep my uncle stocked with morphine, when he had cancer. I headed into the store. The folks behind the counter were cool enough to call my insurance, but alas, since they are a small store, they didn't have a contact with them. "Sorry, sweetie, but have some hand lotion... it's good stuff and a guy here in town invented it!"

I'm rubbing my hands together as I walk out the door, looking at the darkening sky. I love the Southern sky... an endless variation in clouds... so unlike LA, and today the sky was gloomy and dark to the East, but the sun was blazing in the other direction, meaning that the buildings were shining against a dark sky. I cursed my stupid broken camera and headed over to CVS.

"We can't do that. Go to Wal-Mart."

No points for not even trying, CVS, so I go over to Walmart. The wind has picked up and a few large raindrops hit me on my way in... I head to the Drop-Off window at the Pharmacy. There's a tech starting and what might as well be Chinese on the screen... as she seems to have little idea what she should be doing there.

I wait.
and wait.
and wait.

No acknowledgement from tech/computer/chick.

I wonder if I should fake cough or something, when after a good few minutes she turns to me.

She looks at me blankly and I wait for a greeting.

beat

no greeting

ooooookay.... "Hey, I need to fill this prescription, but my insurance is based out of state."

"Oh, I've never done that before... Brenda! This girl's from outta state, how do we call her Wal-Mart and get her medicine?"

"No, I live here, I don't have another Wal-Mart, I just need to fill this script."

"I don't know how to do that.. see... what's your name?"

Right then, I kid you not... lightening strikes near/at the WalMart and the power goes out.

"Now I have to wait for the computer to come back up..."

really? we don't have a hand crank for this thing? I am getting frustrated. This is the third pharmacy, I feel like ass, I really want to be in bed and I haven't even been able to drop the stupid paper off.

The computer comes back up.

"Okay, what's the deal with your insurance?"

"I work here at **** (a national company) but the Blue Crap/Blue Shit insurance is based in another state."

"Do what?"

At this point I need to tell you that the phrase, "Do what?" is getting on my last nerve. People here use it ALL THE TIME. Mostly when they just didn't hear you and would like you to repeat what you have said. Since I talk WAY too fast for this part of the country, then happens to me frequently. I should probably just slow down and use small words.

"Unless you can tell me exactly what code to enter in my computer, I can't help you. Maybe you should try the Wal-Mart in Montgomery."

Mind you, behind the tech is a huge poster claiming that Wal-Mart is a national chain and can handle prescriptions NATIONWIDE.

I look down at my cell phone... I have been here for 45 minutes. To drop off a script.

"Look, just give me back my script, please."

I take the script and leave in a huff.

I am so pissed... I call Dad and then hang up mid-ring thinking I will sound childish to complain to him. I get the brilliant idea to call the other state's Wal-Mart and get the frigging mystery code myself. I call Wetumpka Wal-Mart again.

"If I get the code, can you fill the script?"

"Sure, if you call them and get it, I guess that will work."

"fine."

Dad calls, "what did you need, babe?"

I whine to Dad about Wetumpka sucking and Wal-Mart and insurance...

Dad, "I'm home, so come home and tell me about it."

I head home, and on the way a truck passes me on a narrow road.. I wave my fist at him as he passes at top speed. He sticks his finger back out the window.. then leans out the window.. turned around screaming at me as he speeds away. I can't hear a word of it, as the radio is blaring Postal Service... He swerves and almost runs off the road... overcorrects by going into the other lane of traffic and takes off into the wilderness.

Hmmmmm I guess I could have not inspired that bout of road rage...

I plop on the chair next to Dad who's fiddling with his new laptop and he asks the magical question... "How much would the meds cost if you paid out of pocket?"

I call over to Walmart again.

"$20."

WTF!?!?!?

Dad grins and we get into the car to head back to Wal-Mart to just get the stupid medicine... I think my co-pay would be $15 anyway so the $5 is totally worth not having the insurance grief.

Back to the Drop Off window.

25 minutes later....

"I'm just going to pay out of pocket."

"Well, we don't have any insurance on file for you..."

holy crap--it's the same tech--please don't let me come over the counter....

"Ummm hmmm Just paying cash."

"That'll be forty-five minutes." I check it the time... it's 4:23PM

Dad gets a call on his cell that Mom's locked out of her car in Millbrook, one town over... she was in a hurry and locked her cell in there as well. Dad and I head over to rescue her, and while we're there stop at a Chinese Buffet for dinner.

Buffets are a bad idea. Especially when you are on a diet. I'm pretty good though, a smidgen of rice, chicken and broc with some peas.

During dinner, Noemi's future employer calls from New Zealand to check references... I get excited for her as it seems she's got the job wrapped up and hit with the pangs of wanderlust...

Why am I in a strip mall in Millbrook??

Dad and I head to airport after dinner. I haven't flown with him in a while and he lets me ride in the left seat. Woohoooo! we go through the pre-flight checklists and he gives me some pointers on using the brakes... I'm never done it before... and we take off! It's hazy... but not bad and you can see Lake Jordan, the dam, Wetumpka, the Coosa River, which snakes through the miles of pine forests surrounding where we live... We listen to the traffic and I practice a few 90 degree turns and try to fly level... trimming off the forces, balancing the plane, climbing and dropping... we turn for the airport and we land the plane... I am sure Dad did most of it.. he certainly kept us from getting killed... but I alerted him, "We've stalled!" "That's okay, we're on the ground!" I felt exhilarated nonetheless. I love flying with my Dad. It's a blessing to realize you're having a great moment at the time you're having it.. I felt blessed to get to spend more time with the 'rents.

It's getting dark... Mom is STILL at Wal-Mart getting the script. It took them THREE HOURS to get together 20 pills of Amoxicillian.

If stress cannot be created or destroyed it can just be passed on... I think I passed all the pharmacy stress to Mom.

I meanwhile sniffled and coughed and sneezed after getting back on the ground and have been feeling pretty lousy ever since.

all covered in this podcast.

I tried to speak up.. let me know if it sounds better.

(please)
Safer Sex, Work Review and Mean Comments Podcast

All my bras are too big...
but my underwear still fits.

You do the math.

bleh.

"Well, there were only two possibilities to explain the room I was in. Either I had wandering into a seminar on how to shoplift basketballs, or I was in an obstetrician's office. The current subscription to "Pregnancy" magazine and the unlikelihood of my inadvertently wandering into a crime ring seemed to favor the latter. As did the fact that all the employees had a last names of either "MD," "RN," or "NP." Unfortunately, the very Victorian bench I was sitting on did not lend itself to napping, so my cat's "sleep and it will go away" plan was not an option.

Then Beth came around the corner and told me to come with her. The doctor stuck her hand out and said "Congratulations, Daddy!" Well, that seals that.

She then began writing prescriptions for ultrasounds, nausea medication, and enough folic acid to strip the paint off my car. My eyes were glazing over, but apparently I had some sort of goofy grin because the doctor did not seem overly concerned about me. The good news is that the cat's litter boz is now MY exclusive domain. The power of the scooper is with me! At least until the currently estimated due date of March 27. That number is subject to revision by the ultrasound this coming Monday.

In the meantime I am trying to get used to the idea of being referred to as "Daddy," "Dad," and other variations thereof. Given that I still see myself as a kid (I bought Madden 2006 to celebrate!) this will take a lot of getting used to. I can't speak for Beth on this one. But what I do know is that I am absolutely thrilled to have to figure all this out in addition to how to put a crib together and keep the cats out of it. This is all very terrifying, but the happiest form of terrifying I have ever experienced. Of course, I do reserve the right revise any opinions stated herein.

In the meantime, I plan on keeping everyone updated as news arrives. Yes, we will find out the gender. As Rob put it, you get to be surprised at 4 months instead of 9. Ummm, no have not even put a little thought into the name, although I can assure you that "junior" is not on the list. Thanks everyone for laughing at my attempts at humor, and I look forward to telling you more soon.!

-D"

I guess I can announce now, that I'm going to be an AUNT!!!! WOOHOOOOOOO!!!

Abby came over yesterday, she hadn't seen me since Easter... she looked at me and said, "Wendy! You're a chick!"

I think this is the coolest commentary on my weight loss I have had yet.

Tomorrow is another weigh in and I am feeling nervous. bleh.

You can find my favorite alabama family story on my new Podcast page under "bobby" Podcast

I decided to extend the studio's hours and man... is it making me tired! POOPED, I tell ya.

Thanks for all the comments- it's amazing who you get to talk to on the Internet... Marc asked me to do an interview with Mary Ellen for Buzznet-I'm not sure she would do it, but I think it would be cool to interview some other people... I am going to work on that.

As soon as i get some sleep.

I also need to change my avatar since that was 52 pounds ago and one of my employees upon stumbling onto this page said, "Who is the lady in the upper left hand corner?"

"Me!"

"That lady has freckles!"

"I have freckles, silly!"

"Hmmmm" she said, still unconvinced.

I am planning on posting a picture of myself as soon as I hit 199... My One-derful shot! Maybe I will have to go buy myself a nice dress.

I am also headed to nashville at the end of the month... Anyone out there in Nashvegas?? Wanna meet for drinks?

So I was all jazzed thinking Abbie wanted sx70 and I to read her a bedtime story, but she actually just wanted us to read to her.

hmmm and I had already recorded a bedtime story! bleh. I could have found a much more humorous thing to do... but anyway- here's podcast #2 also with no funny. A child's bedtime story for Abbie.

Sleep well anyway!

Funny is coming tomorrow. I promise, griff!

:) Podcast

another rule broken! So she starts podcasting... Hmmm I need to work on that a bit no?
Let me know at least if the sound is okay.. and maybe next time I'll tell you a funny story!

Podcast

heading to Atlanta today with mummy to pick up an old friend from Virginia. Anna Lena is coming to visit! I was at the hospital when she was born, taking pictures of her very first moments and here she is all growed up! (this seems to be going around) Pics to follow of course.

In other news: people in real life--the non-plugged in types, are starting to notice the results of Project: Ass Reduction.

This is VERY exciting.

thanks for all of the encouragement! Y'all ROCK!